I Cannot Write

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“How prosaic was that piece”

I yelled and screamed

words of sorrow and grief

about a writing of my own

But I never cried thus never felt relieved

about the fact that I cannot write!

     —–

My brain is filled with unfinished lines

too many stories to tell filled with dirty old lies

insomnia haunts me, but still I can’t get it right

when it comes to typing those lines down

My fingers freeze and behind the screen I hide

O, I just cannot write!

     —–

I used to think that I’d be satisfied

if I shut myself out and buried those feelings underneath

the bones of my rib-cage, but now I cannot breathe

and I’m suffocating…can you believe

I utterly cannot write!

   —–

Those stories are now eating me up inside

but I just can’t spit them out even though I tried

to scream and shout ’cause I just can’t type

them down again. It doesn’t feel right

Because I know I cannot write!

     —–

Too many distractions have taken my attention

away from the things I should be concerned

about, and now when I look at my reflection

in the mirror. Uninspired is how I feel

O, dear

it’s so clear

now I’ve a chance to make it right

I can’t just hide behind my fears

forever. I must confess that

I cannot write!

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Lovesick

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She paints her pictures vividly in pink

She’s got crimson blood stains all over her sink

“She’s crazy!” is what they think.

—-

She enjoys the pain of each prick

The scars on her skin can make you feel sick

“She’s insane!” is what they think.

—-

Now she’s holding a feather with dry ink,

she’s babbling words before you blink

“Uninspired!” is what they think.

—-

But if you ran over each pavement brick,

if you didn’t stop spinning before you felt sick,

you’ll know she’s only lovesick.

The Devil Lies

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The devils’ lies

say that hatred hides

behind the angels’ eyes

and it picked the perfect disguise

where no one would find

what they could possibly hide

behind

their utterly innocent-looking eyes

The devil lies

but someday the incandescent will glow so bright

that it will blind

his dark eyes

just to create light

in the darkness that filled our minds

so we could finally find

what laid inside

their beautiful eyes

what will make us wonder if we’ve always been blind

The devil lied.

Surprised?

it wasn’t his first time

 

At the Dark Side of the Moon

 

 

At the dark side of the moon, 

was where I stood to wait for you,

but there was a fine line that intervened 

between the light and darkness; between you and me.

 

At the dark side of the moon,

was where I would be waiting for you

to cross that line that’s been fraught 

with sins, mistakes, and all the wrong things one could make,

but when I passed you by you started having second thoughts

about where you stand, who I am, and how long you’re going to take

to be able to cross that line, and how much I’m willing to wait

at the dark side of the moon.

 

Don’t you worry, love!

I’ll always be here, I’ll never move 

away from the dark side of the moon.

But the stars are watching from above

–I can hear them whispering about us–

it behooves you at least to try

only one more time

to cross that line

to come and stand

here with me…

at the dark side of the moon

darling, this where we were meant to be

 

 

Things are more desirable once forbidden

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Things are more desirable once forbidden

It’s a fact that’s been proven since Adam & Eve

But what did intrigue her was the hidden

Part of the story she couldn’t read

And the empty pages she kept flipping

All night,

looking for lines or words that’s been written

By her, By him, or even them

anything that would explain how they felt after each sin

But the blank pages were impossible for anyone to understand

And as she sat there wandering a rising sound

Echoing inside her body got her astound

“To know the end of the story you must have

a taste of each sin before you die”

A voice that sounded so diabolical spoke from inside

the bones of her rib-cage were her beating heart also laid

and she didn’t have any other choice but to try

each one of those sins just to taste

the feeling of guilt, shame and disgrace

“O, what a shame!” the voice inside her spoke again

Now, could she handle the blame?

I don’t think so, but she already fell for his dirty little game

were we think we’re too strong to just try and never fall

in the same stupid mistakes again

But we never stop before we get our wake up call

In which we lose our family, our friends, or even ourselves

I guess the dilemma about forbidding things

Is the only reason we keep on making these sins

Or at least it’s the only explanation I got

For my bare desire to the appealing sins my eyes caught

Our Play

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What are we doing?

Can we see ourselves?

Who are we fooling?

us or them?

——-

We’re definitely in love

and everyone can tell

but we’re too vain to admit

that in love we fell

——–

Yet, like lovers we act

two fools walking hand-in-hand

pretending to be ‘Just-friends’, we looked so sad

hearing all their gossips about our fake pretentious act

———

And yet we stood, and here we stand

the agony, the misery, just to stay safe

from getting hurt in our sick stupid game

in which we risk it all ’cause we’ve got nothing to live for

but each other. So, we’ll keep playing till the end of this play

and we might as well perfect each and every word in the scripts of these roles

’cause everyone has got a role to play, and we should be perfect…this is OUR PLAY

Human

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I just can’t help it

And it keeps getting worse

“Today will be my last time.

Tomorrow I’ll be more ready”

I keep saying that

But I’m never steady

So emotinally unstable I am

Just like how the sea is untamable I am

My emotions rode a roller-coaster that doesn’t stop

And it’s going too fast for me to jump

Out of it so I’ll just stay in

A couple of more days till I’m ready

But right now I just can’t

This is the only thing I have and always had

How could I give up so easily

On something that was never mine

But if it makes you feel any better I’ll try

To jump out of this mess and if die

You’ll be responsible to explain

Where you’ve been all this time

when to come out of the darkness I tried

But you were never there for me, you never reached out your hand

For me and now it’s too late,

I might never be human again

————————————

But that’s not it…No, this can’t be the end

’cause the minute you’ll see my face

The minute you hold my gaze

You’ll forget who you were and where you’ve been

And the moment we’ll touch you’ll just

Feel the warmth creeping under your skin

Turning you back to your old self…Yes, you’ll be human again

Dread

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My biggest fear is not being able to write again

and at the screen I’ll just be staring

fingers on the keyboard but hands chained

too lost to know what I’ll be saying

Not able to close my eyes from the clutter in my brain

awake I’ll be staying

and in my head I’ll be writing again

pages I’ve been portraying

all night long while on the bed I stayed,

curled myself into a ball and by insomnia was detained

but from writing I couldn’t refrain

and the invisible ink that got my skin stained

was leaked into my blood and now running through my veins

infecting ever single cell of my brain, but I’ll never stop writing before I faint

I’m Your Favorite Sin

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I can see it with my own eyes

even though you’re in disguise

The curiosity you couldn’t hide

–a tide rising over time–

blowing up your mind

Flattered was my pride

that you couldn’t deny it

when your mind decided

it could no longer hide that

I’m your favorite sin

I can see it again

the incandescent in your blood

running through your veins

burning within

to ignite what’s rekindled

inflaming till you surrendered

to carve your heart that hid beneath

bones of a rib-cage weakened by unease

And you closed your eyes as you stood ashamed

when it got written all over your skin

–just to show me once again–

That I’m your favorite sin.

I watched it burn.

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I watched it burn.

This heap of letters

I watched it burn.

To make me feel better

I watched it burn.

With my own eyes

I watched it burn.

For the pain to subside

I watched it burn.

To retract my pride

I watched it burn.

Hoping it would suffice

I watched it burn.

Lest the hunger for revenge,

would eat me up inside

I watched it burn.

Even though I cried

I still watched it burn.

Till the last embers

I watched it burn.

All this December

I’ve watched it burn.

And now I’m numb

but I’ll watch again

when the ashes turn back to flames.